‘You make blind eyes see now I need you to make seeing eyes blind.’

This is the prayer Brother Andrew prayed regularly as he smuggled Bibles and other Christian literature into some of the most closed countries on earth. Now I find myself praying it as I stand at immigration, my backpack brimming with books and right in front of me an x-ray scanner with four heavily armed guards standing watching each bag pass through.

Let’s back this story up a bit...

Two years ago I was working in the Christian music industry hanging out with some of the most well known Christian musicians in the world, now I find myself in a staunchly Islamic country, bag full of Christian literature praying that God would blind the eyes of the guards so that I can get this precious material into a country and ultimately the hands of secret believers.

As I place my bag onto the conveyor belt I take a deep breath in and a slow breath out, compose myself and walk to the other end of the conveyor fully expecting to be grabbed at any moment, but as my backpack passes through not a word is said and I pick it up and head over to the baggage claim area to get my suitacase.

One down, one to go... immigration done, now to grab my suitcase and head through customs.

As I wait for my bag I praise God for getting me through immigration but can’t help but keep thinking, ‘maybe they know and they are just waiting for the right time to get me’. Finally, my suitcase arrives and I grab it and head towards customs which consist of four large steel desks with lines of people having their bags searched. Each and every bag is opened and searched, I pray and ask God what He would have me do and the answer is not exactly one that I wanted to hear, I feel God tells me to walk straight through without lining up! So I grab my suitcase and begin to walk through the customs area and through a circle of five guards. I remember a friend once said to me just look confident and people don’t ask questions, having no idea if this concept actually works I try my best to look as inconspicuous and confident as possible (I am sure there is an oxymoron in there somewhere) but inside I am terrified, as seems to be the case on this trip God rocks up and not a word is said and I walk straight out into the airport terminal to meet my guide and head to the hotel.

Once at the hotel I spend time speaking with my guide and excitedly ask when I can deliver the books to the believers and he tells me, ‘oh we will get to that eventually’, now I am not sure what I was expecting, maybe total thanks and praise for bearing the pressure of getting through customs or the heavens parting with some extra special blessing from God raining down because i... me... was the one who brought these books in?!?! What I can honestly say I was not expecting was, ‘we will get to that eventually’... and here is where one of the most valuable lessons of this trip begins.

A few days later I am picked up to go and meet with secret believers and am told, ‘today is the day, bring the books’, I excitedly pack them into my bag and head down to the lobby once again trying to look as touristy as possible and not draw attention to the extremely heavy and full backpack strapped to my shoulders. We get in the car and begin our journey to the church. As we arrive we’re taken inside and I look at my guide and say what should I do with the books and he replies, ‘oh yeah, the books’, he says ‘come with me’ and we walk into a room in the house where there is a locked filing cabinet, he opens the door asks for the books puts them inside, locks the cabinet and we walk out... that’s it. No songs, no heavens parting, no cheering from the saints, not even a collective thankyou from the church and you know what.. this is exactly how it should be!

Why am I more special than these guys? They live a faith that literally risks life and limb everyday and for some reason I was hoping I’d get ongoing praise for being the foreigner who bought in these books!

What I got was the perfect response, gratitude but not overstated, an appreciation but not a fan fare, if anything I should be the one praising these guys as they live a faith fraught with danger – I felt God remind me of the need to let go of the old self and focus on the new self. As Christians we are not called to be famous for God, we are called to be humble servants who follow His leading. God moved mountains to get me into that country and blinded the eyes of guards yet I was craving more, but not more of God, more of man, more acclaim, more praise, more recognition but did I recognise, God for His contribution? Did I lavish praise on Him for blinding the eyes of the guards? Am I in North Africa to serve me or to serve Him?

Who do you serve? Yourself or God?

Are you looking for recognition and fan fare or are you content in knowing that above all God should be glorified?

Thank you so much for coming on this journey with us and we hope the last 30 days has been life-changing for you my encouragement to you is don’t stop there, don’t stop at 30-days keep it going for months, years, even a lifetime! Find that heartsong to God and declare every morning that you are a new creation in Christ, the old has gone, the new has come.

If you’d like to book a speaker or find out more about the ministry of Open Doors please email us at mhb@od.orgwe’ll happily get straight back to you. Alternatively you can follow us on facebook or support our ministry by making a donation or buying a shirt. We would also love you to share this series of BLOGs with your friends and family as we want to change the spiritual temperature of Australia and see a generation switched on to the things of God.